Links
- Meg Galante-DeAngelis wrote: "I found some comfort in an old friend - Fred Rogers. The link was sent to me by my colleagues Anne Bladen and Kim Larrabee at UConn Child Development Labs." http://fci.org/new-site/par-tragic-events.html
- Because the World is Dangerous Place: Helping Children Deal with Violence in the News by Diane E. Levin
- Guidelines for Helping Children Deal with News Violence by Diane E. Levine
- Darlene Howland at Wellesley Community Children's Center suggests this article for parents with elementary school children: Talking About Tragic Events
- Julia daSilva (Director of the Violence Prevention Office of the APA) suggested: Talking to Your Children about the Recent Spate of School Shootings
- Kari Adamson, from the Marriage & Family Counseling Program at UConn suggested:
- Helping Your Children Manage Distress After a School Shooting
- When Children Experience Trauma: A Guide for Parents and Families
- Age Related Reactions to e Traumatic Event
- For those with young children: Talking with Kids about the News: Strategies for Talking and Listening
- Sarah Becker, Director of Williams College Children's Center suggested: Tips for Talking to Children After Disaster.pdf and another article on “Helping Children Cope with Tragedy Related Anxiety”
- The Department of Early Education and Care has offered up some resources on trauma and guns in the lives of children:
- WGBH in Boston has produced a series of “Arthur” character themed resources that are designed to help families talk with children about scary experience they see in their communities or on television. The materials include pamphlets with tips, and books including “Helping Our Children Feel Safe”. All of the materials are available in both English and Spanish.
Helping Children with Tragic Events
We are all deeply saddened by the events at Sandy Hook Elementary School. When faced with such a tragedy, it is easy to feel overwhelmed and frightened.
What is difficult for our community is that the involved children were close in age to our children. As difficult as it is, our role as adults is to reassure our young children that this event is highly unlikely to occur in their school and that many things are done here to ensure their personal safety. We are here to keep them safe and engaged with each other in play. This is not to say that we should act as though nothing has happened. However it is important to present ourselves as confident in providing a safe home and school and that we can manage our own anxiety, sadness, and outrage. Children read our feelings and react.
We want to share with you some suggestions that others (in particular, our friend Diane Levin) have offered in the past, when having to speak with children about school shootings and tragic public events. I hope you find these articles helpful.
To summarize our approach:
In front of young children who know nothing about these events:
- Avoid bringing up the events of today when they are within listening range.
- We advise that you not turn on the TV or radio to find more details if your children are around.
For those children who are aware of the events particularly older children: Your answers need not be long responses, leave room for the child to ask more about what you’ve said. This will guide you in knowing what the child is thinking about.
- Ask them what they think happened or heard, and what it means for them?
- Respond to their statements and their concerns.
- Focus on their current level of safety in their school and home.
- When children ask about the injured? Try saying something like: “People who are injured are taken to hospitals and cared for by trained people.”
- When asked what happens next for those in Newtown? An answer might be: “There are lots of people who are trained as rescue workers, police, health care workers and mental health professionals to support the families, school children and teachers. “
In our side bar are links to help you continue to research how to best handle this tragedy in your own family.If you find other resources please share them with us. If you have thoughts, concerns, remember we are a community who is here for each other and can address this tragedy together.