OK, Boomer
Ok, Boomer Export 8
Tue, 7/26 1:18PM • 18:01
SUMMARY KEYWORDS
humor, age, comedy, billy, boomer, seniors, laugh, relationships, life, researchers, people, older, maria, explained, fun, aging process, darlene, jokes, laughter, bonnie
SPEAKERS
Maria Giapraki, Jillian Brosofsky, Bonnie Barchichat, Other Heidi's Customers, News Anchors, Darlene, Older Comic, Denise, Robert Waldinger, Billy Van Zandt
Robert Waldinger 00:00
Good relationships keep us happier and healthier. Period.
Jillian Brosofsky 00:05
Dr. Robert Waldenger seems pretty confident here. And he shouldn't be. 82 years ago, 724 men of college age signed up for a study through Harvard University about adult development. Because these men participated in the study, researchers have collected decades of life events, hours of interviews and a web of statements from friends and family. It all answers the question, what makes a good life? The conclusion warrants repeating, quality relationships. But how? How do you cultivate a lifetime of relationships and stay in contact with people as you grow along sometimes divergent paths? This is especially hard in the current climate around aging. Let me paint a picture.
News Anchors 00:52
Baby boomers, baby boomers, baby boomers. The world is getting older. By 2050 the US is expected to have the largest older population of all developed nations, with the exception of China and India. As baby boomers age society and America has aged.
Jillian Brosofsky 01:10
America's population is aging rapidly. Every day the country sees 10,000 People turned 65. As the number of working adults decreases, the toll on health care and the economy will make this increase unsustainable. Not only that, but many in the millennial and Generation Z age groups feel that they're inheriting a world corrupted by baby boomers. Some explain that it's as if we've been handed the bill for a party we never got to attend. As a society, we found our way down this Ok Boomer hole, and it's getting harder and harder to see the way out. So how do we promote healthy aging to take the pressure off the health care system and those of working age and bridge the divide between generations? Psychologists and other researchers are discovering that there's a surprising connection between the two at the intersection of relationships and humor.
Billy Van Zandt 02:05
The gist of our show basically is the only way to really get through the aging process is to laugh about it with your friends.
Jillian Brosofsky 02:11
That's the thesis of the boomer boys musical, as told by one of its creators and stars, Billy Van Zandt. And yes, he is part of that Van Zandt family. Billy is the little brother of little Steven. That's Out of the Darkness. One of the elder brothers songs. Billy is Boomer boys musical sounds a little different though. Full of hits like I Turned into My Dad, His Prostate is the Size of a Buick, We're Going Through Manopause. The show isn't going to make it to Broadway anytime soon. The colonoscopy rap doesn't hold some grand truth. And the song about brain farts isn't going to enlighten anyone on the meaning of life. But the four men in their 60s will probably make you laugh. Even the origins of the show display the connection between humor and relationships. When Waylon Picard, the musician for the show, came up with the idea in 2016, Billy's writing partner Jane Milmore agreed to it without missing a beat. Though Billy saw promise in the show, he wondered about the quickness of her response.
Billy Van Zandt 03:30
She said I'd rather write about it and hear you talk about it all the time.
Jillian Brosofsky 03:33
So the relationship survived and prospered not despite jabs like this, but perhaps because of it. Humor makes life interesting and adds nuance and fun, even to decades long relationships. And the show may provide some insight into how aging impacts us all. Billy starts their performances with the following sentiment.
Billy Van Zandt 03:53
We're here to let the ladies know that we men of a certain age are going through. And for younger people, we're here to scare the crap out of you.
Jillian Brosofsky 04:00
It's working. Many young people come and laugh at the first half until they realize that's their future. Billy's favorite response to the show, though is when women who came with their husbands come again with their friends.
Billy Van Zandt 04:12
We did have one woman her back this. She said I never knew it. My husband was going through
Jillian Brosofsky 04:17
The point. The essence of the show can be summarized by their nickname. Channeling Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin and others, the Boomer Boys have been called the fatpack. And it's not just because there are four men singing on stage. They got this title because they are genuine friends often bonded through comedy and brought together in the show. Billy has been friends with his fellow stars for decades. He's known castmate Tom Frasca tour since kindergarten and Glenn Jones another Boomer boy has been in over 20 plays Billy and Jane worked on.
Billy Van Zandt 04:52
Jeff Bay. He's the newcomer. We've only known him 30 years.
Jillian Brosofsky 04:55
Dr. Walter would be so proud. Loneliness is a silent Killer, and researchers are starting to discover its impact on the older generation. Dr. Gill Greengross A humor researcher and psychology professor at Aberystwyth University in Wales, explained that humor is a great way not only to create, but also to maintain social relationships. When asked why he chose to study humor and aging, he noted that this is an understudied group in general. And he's not alone in thinking that.
Maria Giapraki 05:26
I think that sometimes their psychological health is a little disregarded.
Jillian Brosofsky 05:34
This is Maria Giapraki, talking about why she chose to research humor in the aging population. She conducted research a few years ago on humor as a possible non medical intervention that promotes healthy aging. And currently, she's a researcher in the Netherlands. While she had never heard of the boomer boys musical, shocking I know, she saw the importance of viewing aging through a comedic lens.
Maria Giapraki 05:57
I think it also helped you like kind of feel better about your situation like even when you have like serious health issues, and you are approaching them from from a lighter point of view and you're actually making fun of them, it can actually help your psychological well being
Jillian Brosofsky 06:20
Comedy can do things like boost serotonin levels, making you feel happier, and decrease cortisol reducing feelings of stress. And that's just the act of making a joke. The relationships that come out of those jokes, the social connections vital to everyone's well being young and old, can do the same while enhancing feelings of love and trust. Again, and again researchers explained that humor is real benefit is in forming and strengthening relationships in old age. While Maria was conducting her research, she found just observationally that humorous people had more social connections in their community home
Maria Giapraki 06:58
The people that were more humorous, there were more social as well, and you would see them in groups with more people.
Jillian Brosofsky 07:08
Humor can bring people together. All the more important in old age when social connections tend to break down. The fatpack proves consistently that there's an appetite for this type of comedy and community. When I asked Billy about his favorite performance, he got quiet. His show man exterior melted away for a moment. He explained that after Jane passed away in February of 2020, the world and their show shut down with the pandemic. Last July, the men took the stage in their home state of New Jersey and performed again, they got to pay a touching tribute to Jane and the audience loved it.
Billy Van Zandt 07:46
We didn't even turn the house lights off when we did the show. We just left everything up because people were dancing and jumping around and stuff. It was fun.
Jillian Brosofsky 07:54
The Boomer boys musical promotes intergenerational empathy, while also modeling how humor can serve as a catalyst for the healthy relationships important in the aging process. But this is a single type of humor meant to unite people from different age groups and genders. What about comedy that caters specifically to the older generation? Does it serve the same purpose of promoting relationships and empathy? Or are there other benefits to it entirely? Comedy is not one size fits all. What appeals to one age group may not appeal to everyone. Bonnie Barchichat knows this all too well. 12 years ago when she took her 89 year old mother to a comedy show, Bonnie did not get the reaction she was expecting.
Bonnie Barchichat 08:41
She just could not take the the dirty language that she was hearing when I'd take her out to the improv for comedy.
Jillian Brosofsky 08:50
This set off a years long mission to make her mother and other seniors laugh. And it served as the motivation behind Senior Comedy Afternoons. These events provide lunch and entertainment for seniors filled with music, jokes and fun costumes. Most importantly, it's a program that provides a platform for older comedians to perform stand up for their peers. There are jokes about pillboxes and joining AARP, and this one about finding love in old age.
Older Comic 09:19
You know, I just joined a dating service in LA you know what it's called? Who's left.
Jillian Brosofsky 09:25
The shows provide spaces for the seniors to be unapologetically, well, old. Can't get up from the table without help need to use a walker or a cane? Odds are you're not alone. The lunches allow seniors to embrace their aging bodies and minds instead of fearing the social isolation and issues that often come with aging. In Bonnie's opinion, laughter really is the best medicine.
Bonnie Barchichat 09:48
Once you get older, all kinds of aches and pains and diseases crop up on you and you can take a few hours out of your life and get a few laughs and then go back to your existence well it makes life just a lot more tolerable.
Jillian Brosofsky 10:01
No, seriously. Laughter According to Maria has many physical benefits as one ages
Maria Giapraki 10:07
It can relieve pain and they also say that he hates in the central nervous system.
Jillian Brosofsky 10:15
By they she's referring to previous researchers on this topic
Maria Giapraki 10:18
I will hear more people may also feel more trust.
Jillian Brosofsky 10:23
Like the boomer boys musical Senior Comedy Afternoons draws older adults into a community, if only for a few hours. Eating, laughing and dancing together, the seniors are bonded through these fun events meant for them. And they need some comedy for themselves. Humor is not static throughout the lifetime. Think about it for a moment. Do you still laugh at the same things you did when you were in elementary school, middle school, even high school? Senses of humor changed throughout the lifespan in a U shape as Dr. Greengross explained. In early life the brain is developing. And some jokes that seemed hysterical when we were younger, become boring and trivial as we age. In older age, cognitive functions start to decline and what we find funny begins to look different too. This is not to say that seniors become mentally like children, that is demeaning and wrong. Just because things like the ability to retain new information and remember things decline doesn't mean that wealth of knowledge and wisdom decreases as well. Understanding the type of humor that seniors respond to, and that promote socialization is incredibly important in discovering if humor can help in the aging process. Maria examined this in her study,
Maria Giapraki 11:34
There are four humor styles. There are two that increase well being which are actually the self enhancing humor and the affiliative humor. And then there are other two more maladaptive humor styles. The one is the aggressive humor style and the other is the self defeating humor size
Jillian Brosofsky 11:55
Affiliative humor. The jokes at Senior Comedy Afternoons land because the comedian and the audience have collective experiences that a college student may not have. Humor when usedstrategically can serve as a coping mechanism through something called the broaden and build theory. Have you ever had a really fun interaction with a friend and it just made your day? You think about it for a long while afterward, in the single interaction makes life just feel more manageable. Or maybe you've got bad feedback on something and it tanksyour entire day. This is the broaden and build theory. There is something that anchors your day and it becomes easier to make it light and happy or a pity party.
Maria Giapraki 12:37
As you grow older, when you try to incorporate in your daily life, these more positive things such as humor it can always help you grow and cope with difficulties.
Jillian Brosofsky 12:57
Even with all these observable benefits of humor. Researchers can't say for certain that humor alone could work as an intervention for healthy aging. Maria explained what it could be though. There are different types of treatments involving humor, such as clown interventions, but humor works best when integrated into a broader therapy relationship.
Maria Giapraki 13:18
Therapists may also use humor in order to build a good rapport with their clients.
Jillian Brosofsky 13:29
Clearly, humor can be used to enhance treatments throughout the lifespan, but especially in old age as quality relationships become increasingly important. But not everyone can afford to see musicals and have fun lunches whenever they need a laugh. So how do older people find comedy in their everyday lives? And how does it impact their aging process? This is the sound of Heidi's restaurant in Waltham. The smell of grease and pancakes hits you immediately when you walk in. But what really sticks out is a woman standing in the middle of the dining room talking to everyone and anyone. She erupts into laughter every couple seconds and she makes big expressive hand gestures like she can't contain her emotions. Later I learned her name is Darlene and I sat with her her mother and her sister Denise to ask them about humor and what their breakfasts are like at Heidi's. This is Darlene.
Darlene 14:26
We bring, my mom's 91, and we both retired and we have a younger sister that when she comes here she's really fun. But
Denise 14:36
Hey, I thought we were
Darlene 14:37
Yeah, I know, it's extra added
Jillian Brosofsky 14:39
That voice at the end belongs to Denise. The family comes every morning at eight o'clock and hangs out with each other and other regulars they've met throughout the years. They talk about everything and nothing anything that pops into their head about life and current events. I think cheers said it best. In the 15 minutes I sat there, I heard all about their family who graduated from where, how many siblings they have and everyone's marital status. But most of all, we laughed. At the 10 minute mark, Darlene asked if I had any more questions,
Darlene 15:19
You have more questions. I'm ready to answer them.
Other Heidi's Customers 15:24
She only asked one question.
Jillian Brosofsky 15:25
Those voices came from the table Darlene was talking to before.
Darlene 15:29
We talked for a half hour, I'll get
Jillian Brosofsky 15:35
All the benefits of humor, social connection, physical and psychological health and more generally, a positive affect are on display in this small diner on Moody Street. Humor brings them together every morning and keeps them involved in each other's lives. After yelling at her sister to go away, Denise explains what these breakfasts add to their lives. Laughter is a great way to start her day and she does it with people she loves. She points to her mom as an example of the power of humor.
Denise 16:03
Well look at 91 Just smile and still up there. You know, she's she raised a great family and we we like to treat her well actually she pays for it so.
Jillian Brosofsky 16:25
The motto of the boomer boys musical is age gratefully. There is profound humility and standing in front of an audience or even having a conversation with your family and talking and joking about aging. Comedy in general is a great way to appreciate the life you've lived rather than fearing what time you have left. Source material for this podcast includes Robert Waldenger's TED talk from November 2015. And Bonnie Barchichats promotional video for March 17 2014. The sources for the montage and the beginning of this piece came from in order, CBS N, PBS News Hour, CNBC, BBC News, The Wall Street Journal and the Conversation. Music includes Curiosity by Fearless Motivation Instrumentals, Little Stevens Out of the Darkness Featuring the Disciples of Soul. The Cheers intro song, the instrumental version of Changes by David Bowie and Always Look on the Bright Side of Life by Monty Python. Special thanks to Billy Van Zandt, Bonnie Barchichat, Maria Giapraki, Gil Greengross and those at Heidi's restaurant for their interviews with me in April of this year.